Joey:Hello Karl! It's great to talk to you. How are the Spring collections going?
Karl:Hello. They're going great. I'm ready for next season!
J:On a stranded island which is more important to bring?Chanel weights or the Chanel safety pin?
K:Oh, the safety pin to keep safe.
J:You talk a lot about people who are demode. Who is not demode to you?
K:Anna, Me, Yves, you know....the beautiful ones.
J:Now that you don't want to speak to Lindsay anymore, Who is your next starlet of choice?
K:Mm. They're all so demode now. So boring, so controlled.
J:You said in an interview that you hate all children, did you hate yourself when you were a child?
K:I was never a child. Ever. I came out of my mothers womb in a suit and sunglasses.
J:I know you like Diet Coke, have you ever tried Coke Zero?
K:Are you a spy from someplace to place insidious thoughts in my mind about trying that so-called drink??
...There's your answer. Karl knows best. Remember this.
J:If Claudia Schiffer didn't exist, who would be in your ad campaigns?
K:But, Claudia must exist. It's impossible for her not to, hmmmm?
There is always a Claudia around. So I guess the campaigns would have no one in them.
J:What is your favorite documentary about yourself?
K:I hate them all, equally. Documentaries aren't for watching anyway, hmm?
J:Which line of yours do you prefer? Chanel, Karl Lagerfeld, or Fendi?
K:Which me are we talking about, hmmm? Fashion today is for mixing. There is no labels- labels are for fat people, for whores, for rich peasants, you know? No lines. Today we mix a Mozart with a Beethoven, and so on. I don't have a favourite- they are for mixing. Mixing mixing mixing.
J:I hear you're in Mary Kate and Ashley's new coffee table book. How did that interview go?
K:It went well, I feel. Mary Kate is like a little china banana, you know?
J:Will you ever give up any of your lines to another designer?
Thank you Karl!